Let me pause here for a second to assure you that no lizards were harmed in the writing of this post. Also, the photos are recreations of actual events and names may or may not have been changed to protect innocent lizards. All dogs are presumed innocent until proven guilty by a court of law. Now that I am done laughing, on with the story....
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It was a warm and sunny afternoon. I was sunbathing and minding my own business when all of the sudden it happened: I saw a lizard on the inside of the patio screen. I had been waiting for this moment. Normally, these sneaky lizards taunt and tease me from the outside of the screen and just when I am about to pounce, BAM! they shimmy up the screen and out of sight. But today, TODAY, I had one within my grasp.
Side-note: notice how I am wearing my Kool Collar!
I got into my hunting position: my ears pointed straight up, my pushed in nose sniffing the delicious scent of lizard, and my pig-like legs ready to spring at any moment. Then the lizard made the mistake of trying to escape. HA HA not today, Laverne the Lizard, not today! I swatted that lizard with my paw and grabbed him with my mouth. I was so proud! I won, I won, I w- WHACK!
What the heck just happened? I'll tell you what happened - my human and their bleeding heart whacked me on the back and let Laverne free. But, little did my human know, I had back-up. Lilo the pug shot out like the ninja that she is and scooped up the lizard in her mouth; and then she took off as fast as her pug-feet could go. Not fast enough for that dastardly human though. He grabbed Lilo and plucked Laverne right out of her mouth. And then let Laverne go. And then Laverne was laughing at us from outside the screen before running off into the sunset. No Victory for us. Keep laughing, Laverne, we'll get you next time.
I went off to find a sunspot to sulk for awhile, but Lilo was immediately distracted by the sprinklers and began practicing her karate on the droplets of water shooting through the screen. Swatting her paws as if she was waxing on and waxing off. I think
Tell me,
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